This is technically a post about last Wednesday, but with deadlines beginning to lower on the horizon, I feel more comfortable dwelling in the plush, comforting world of the past.

Wednesday was a beautiful day. The sun shone high in the sky, casting her life-giving bounty down upon her children (and, presumably, Krypton's last son). Birds, leaves, yadda yadda - I turned Claudia's paper in! Oh joy of joys - detach the stone of shame and attach the stone of triumph! It turned out to be quite long and involved, though only time will tell if she likes it. But it has coins, Dio Cassius and John Scheid in it, so she should, right?

Flushed with a fleeting sense of achievement I knew that it was Time. I quietly rode the bus back to Los Feliz, then humbly made my way from the penultimate stop along Sunset Blvd., past the children's hospital and Vons, and safely across Virgil, Bruce Willis still glowering down the barrel of his gun from the marquee of the Vista. I spared not a thought at this juncture for Blockbuster, and it never even crossed my mind to continue down Sunset to Acapulco's or Circuit City. No, today was the culmination of twenty months of diligence and preparation, an occasion to mark the triumph of the human spirit. Like Hercules and Lance Armstrong before me, I'd set myself what at the time seemed an impossible goal, and today I would reap the fulfilment of a long dream.

Because, you see, if you get twelve haircuts at Supercuts, the thirteenth, dear reader, is FREE.

That's quite a lot of hair. And the journey encompassed two January 1sts, which meant price hikes of at least 50 cents each time. But I overcame inflation. Diligently did I get my little card stamped every time I loosed the artistes within upon my coiffure, carrying it and the hope it represented reverently in my wallet since August 2003. People waxed poetic on the virutes of Fantastic Sam's, or even Rudy's, the stylish garage-style shop across the street. But I listened not to their tales of perdition. Rather, I steered true the course, and sit before you tofay with an elegantly appointed (and, above all, free) haircut that is worth every penny I paid for it.

Mark me, dear, sweet reader, I am no hero. I am very much the everyman. My achievement, though staggering in magnitude, is within the reach of every man, woman and child who cares to strive for greatness. And strive we must, if we are ever to reach our full potential as a race of beings. With moderately priced haircuts.

It was only afterwards that I nipped next door to Blockbuster and traded in XIII and Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Chaos Bleeds against Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory, to receive the latter for less than $25. Which goes to show you the kind of margin they have on these things. But seriously, Blockbuster's current trade-in scheme is a very good deal. Kudos.

The new maps are here!